Morgan Monks
Bonnie Moore
English 2010-027
April 22nd 2014
Figuring out My Family
Throughout this semester I have learned quite a bit about my family and it has helped me understand my past and find more meaning in my family encounters. I thoroughly enjoyed digging into my families past and finding things about it that I never knew about before. Also I discovered even more about my family in situations I already knew about. Overall I feel these cultural artifacts have helped me come to know my family and past in a different light.
I think that my family fits the general descriptions of a family pretty well.For one thing, the majority of my family is all biologically related and we all used to live together. That in its self qualifies for one definition of a 'family'. I think also that my personal family has an even deeper meaning. One thing that really creates a family mentality is support for one another. If my family, everyone is very supportive of people's life decisions and we are there for each other in hard times. No matter what we have going on in our lives, when someone needs help we all stop what we are doing and do everything we can to be there for each other. A strong support group of a group of persons is another definition of a family and my family fits that description.
By finding these cultural artifacts I have not only learned things I never knew, but I really was able to dig in and find out the stories behind the things of my families past. To cultural objects that I learned the general facts behind were the old family bible and my four generation genealogy chart. Through these projects I have learned a lot about my ancestors and heritage. I really enjoyed reading about things that my ancestors have done and thinking about how their actions have impacted my life. Another thing I learned about my family was more of how I interact with them. For example in my 'family song' I really looked into why You are My Sunshine means so much to me and it really was an enlightening experience. Overall researching traditions and things of my family have not only taught me much about my past, but have also given me insight into my current family. I now have a different view of my family and our interactions with one another.
Over the years my family has had their own trials and hardships like all families do. We have had our fair share of arguments over trivial things and somehow continually make them a bigger deal than they are. One of the biggest trying experiences I would say my family has overcome is the adoption of my younger siblings. The past five years have been difficult with the adjustment and trying to keep up with all the new things happening, from graduations to baseball games it seems we never really have time to just sit around and socialize like we used to. However, welcoming four new people into our family and not letting the difficult things affect our love of one another has made us closer than ever before; I am truly grateful for that.
Looking into the traditions and attributes I really want to carry a lot of that over into my own future family. I hope to have a loving husband and adorable children in the future whom I will all love so very much. I want to be able to do fun and active things together and be very close-- similarly to how my current family is. I also want to carry over my families traditions such as our Christmas Tree tradition and how we spend special days together. Another cultural artifact I plan to carry onto my future family is the lullaby my mother used to sing to me. I hope that song means just as much to them as it has to me. All in all I don't want my future family to be an exact copy of my family, but I do want to share many things. However, the most important thing to me for my future family is that we support each other in the good times and the bad and are a strong support system for each other.
Tuesday, April 22, 2014
PRE
Flaws in Foster Care
In April of 2012, my family grew astronomically in size literally overnight. We went from a family of five children to eight and my mom didn't spend a single second in a hospital. Although my family had adopted before-- my then six year old brother Kooper-- this time was different. Instead of adopting one three year old as we had with Kooper, we received not only a three year old but a four year old and a seven year old as well; all sisters. Lets just say things became crazy quickly. As my family grew to love these precious angels, we began to come across rather large obstacles along the way not only making life harder on the girls, but on the whole family as well. Honestly, we were not prepared to deal with them.
Before the adoption of my three sisters Maggie, Malia and Makenna, my family embarked on the journey that ended with finding my little brother Kooper. A three year old, freckle faced, squished nose, orange haired, pudgy little boy who to us was rather a mystery. He lived in the same foster home ever since he was eight months old. Although his education lacked greatly and his vocabulary seemed rather small, he had been cared for in a loving home. The transition was hard but nothing we had not prepared for and soon enough I and my family were wrapped around his soft, chubby little finger. The adoption process had gone quite smoothly with Kooper and after the six months of trial foster care he was legally adopted into my family. This positive experience paved the way for future adoption experiences.
Two years later my mom came across the Wednesday's child story on three little girls. In Idaho Wednesday's child is a spotlight on children in foster care broadcasted on the news to help children become adopted. With in two weeks my family had a home study done (which typically takes 2-3 months) and our name along with three hundred other families was put into the application process to adopt the girls. After weeks the committee had narrowed the pick to 3 families, mine being one of them. After another week my family was informed we were chosen to be the girls new family, a family they had never before met. It was an exciting time as we prepared to have these three new additions to out family. However, there was nothing that could quite prepare us for what was yet to come.
We spent one day with the girls after the and after those twelve hours were expected to decide if we wanted to continue with the adoption process. Of course we agreed and the next weekend the girls were placed into our home. The complications and difficulties both emotionally and physically started as soon as the girls entered into our home. The frustrating part was that many of them could have been helped or prevented if the foster care system took the initiative and more closely evaluated the situation at hand.The Idaho State Foster system should evaluate the physical and emotional status of children prior to their adoption process. Better state involvement will not only benefit the children of the state but also adoptive families.
The first area where the foster care system needs to improve is in the medical examinations. Once parental rights have been terminated it is critical that all current and past physical problems are closely looked into. Termination of parental rights occurs by a judge typically after 18 months of children in foster care and parents have not improved their situation and their legal rights to their children are taken away (Moe). This then grants all legal custody of the child to the state health and welfare system (Dickerson). Once the state has legal power it is pertinent that all physical examinations, checkups, blood tests and DNA tests. This is so there are no more unknown cause of illness, birth defects and any other physical characteristics that seem the list bit out of the ordinary.
Many may say doing all medical tests may damage the child, but it is better for them in the long run. It is better for example to draw a small vial of blood in order to eliminate the possible risks of disease or defect than to remain ignorant of a possible condition that may end up a life threatening condition.
The next needed change to the foster system is takin action. This however does not simply mean to slap a metaphorical bandaid over the affects of the issues, but rather to try and fix the cause of the problem. Taking initiative and solving a problem may require a medical procedure, but in the long run it will be more beneficial to a child. Proper medical action not only will benefit the children's lives with a healthy start but also assist in the actual adoption of children. A prospective family will be much more willing to adopt a child with a health condition that has been addressed than a mystery. The fact of the matter is 50% of children in foster care have chronic medical issues (Adoption Statistics). Many of which can be not only helped but minimized and completely treated with proper medical action (Foster Care Facts).
My adopted siblings were a contributor to the sorrowing medical statistics. All three of my siblings had chronic medical issues when they came into our home. The youngest two had chronic sinus infections that left their noses faucets to a consistent stream of green sludge along with ear aces that left them crying almost every night. They were both on three different medications and they seemed to not be helping the situation. Once my family was allowed to make medical decisions for the girls we had tubes put in all their ears and within weeks the sinus and ear infections stopped almost completely. Along with that, the middle child Malia was born with her left eye blind and there was no known reason. We had blood and DNA tests performed to determine the problem. We soon discovered she had Peter's Anomaly which often associates with heart, lung, and other import organ abnormalities. This scary discovery was accompanied with the discovery that Makenna had Turner's syndrome -- a genetic defect on the X chromosome-- which not only can have serious other medical issues but also affects her learning ability and ADHD. With this new found knowledge, my family immediately had the girls tested. Luckily they had no life threatening conditions. We were lucky, but not all foster children are. All these medical tests my family had performed could have legally and easily been done while the children were in foster care. If their situation had been different (like many other children) the delay in medical attention could have led to life-threatening conditions.
On any given day there are 400,000 kids ranging from 0-18 in the foster care syatem (Foster Care Facts). This large number often leaves resources stretched thin. The limited resources do give an understanding to why there is such a lack of attention and detail to children in the system. According to the US foster care coalition, the Social Security Act allows for an annual 4 billion dollar budget on foster care. This accounts for approximately $10,000 for each child in the system annually. However, there are also state and grant funding that provide the system with more money. All children in foster care also are covered under medicaid (US Dept. of Health and Welfare). Although the funding for the system is rather limited, it would actually save the government money by solving children's medical issues rather than pay for the expensive medications (Adoption Statistics). It is necessary that the children of today are healthy as possible so they can lead better and more happy lives in their future.
Another flaw in the foster care system is the lack of communication between foster care providers and prospective families. According to the Foster Care Reference Center, the state (Idaho) is legally responsible to inform families of all conditions both physically and psychologically relating to the child (Foster Care Facts). However, as explained above if the full status of the child is unknown, it is rather difficult to inform a prospective parent of possible issues. If foster care providers have limited knowledge of a child's circumstances they will not be able to properly inform a parent.
Along with troubles in communication, many things told to adoptive families seem to be only part of the truth. Many of the things they do know seem rather sugar coated. The fact of the matter is 80% of children in foster care have serious psychological issues (Adoption Statistics). One of the trials in foster care that adds to these serious issues is that the average child in foster care is moved in homes several times over the average 2 year stay before adoption or reunion with biological parents (Foster Care Facts). This constant transfer of children from home to home not only has phycological repercussions but also a loss of information. As a child goes from home to home not all knowledge pertaining to the child's status is transferred with them.
My siblings (the three girls) were moved into four different foster care families during their years in care and were separated from each other for several of those times. Not only did this lead to serious detachment disorder in the children, but left them with no sense of trust and permanency. Also there seemed to be a lack of information on the previous two years of their life; leading to a larger confusion when they were placed in my families home.
Along with the lack of information provided to my family the information we did received seemed to be quite sugar coated. Before adoption we and were told the oldest child-- who had received the most abuse and neglect-- was a 'difficult child'. The only explanation for her behavior was her rather rocky past. However after many doctors visits and therapy, my family discovered she had a severe case of ADHD (partly because of the turner's syndrome) and a also delay in her learning. This newfound information helped my family better deal with the difficulties of raising Makenna and made coping with the stress much easier. If the state had done the work my family did prior to her adoption, Makenna could have had earlier educational intervention along with help pertaining to her ADHD. Also my family could have better prepared for the situation and a year of confusion and failed attempts to solve problems could have been avoided.
Similarly to the struggles of dealing with medical issues in foster care, the system is stretched rather thin in their attempt to care for all children and manage phycological problems as well. Despite this struggle the state system does put therapy and helping abuse victims (like my siblings) cope with their past high on their priority list. They do not sell children short on attaining a stable mental condition and use highly qualified therapists to do so. However, this is not enough. Talk therapy can only do so much for certain children and it is often times necessary to determine underlying causes of psychological issues rather than aiding the affects of them. If Health and Welfare spends more time and energy solving the core issues many children will better progress towards a healthy mental state. When more information is known and situations are better analyzed the adoption process will become a much smoother process for both adoptive families and children.
All in all the foster care system has rather large flaws in the way things are run, especially when it comes to foster to adoption cases. The main purpose of foster care is to the future reunion with biological families (US Dept. of Health and Welfare). Thus the foster to adopt process is not the main focus. Only 20% of foster care cases end in adoption and therefor it makes sense that it receives only a small focus (Adoption Statistics).This however needs to change. Children in the system placed for adoption often times are faced with the most terrifying past; riddled with physical abuse, neglect, sexual abuse, emotional abuse, abandonment and much more. The fact of the matter is, these children are being swept under the carpet. One reasoning for this is the ideology that some foster care providers have. Many feel because children will soon be moved onto the next stage in the process their problems will become someone else's.
Out of all foster care adoptions. 20% of fail. Along with that sobering statistic,10% of children in the system age out, thats 40,00 per year (Dickerson, Mardi). (Meaning they turn 18 with no family ties). They are then alone in the world. That is a sobering idea! If the system changes part of their focus to the children in difficult circumstances, perhaps their lives and the lives of many other families will be changed dramatically.
The entire foster care system needs an overhaul start to finish. In foster care there is a serious lack of attention to the needs of the children and families. However, many adoptions go smoothly without too much turbulence through the boat ride of adoption; like my families' adoption of Kooper. On the other hand many others have tilde-wave size obstacles. Perhaps if the system is redirected, many of these life changing disasters will be avoided. Then less children will be swept out into the unforgiving sea of the world without a strong family lifeline. In order to make this change law makers, social workers and foster families need to take action and make sure children in care are properly evaluated and taken care of. Also, families need to be properly informed and better prepared for the trials of adoption ahead. If action is not taken the foster-care system will continue to fail children. If this happens the future will be failed as well.
Flaws in Foster Care
In April of 2012, my family grew astronomically in size literally overnight. We went from a family of five children to eight and my mom didn't spend a single second in a hospital. Although my family had adopted before-- my then six year old brother Kooper-- this time was different. Instead of adopting one three year old as we had with Kooper, we received not only a three year old but a four year old and a seven year old as well; all sisters. Lets just say things became crazy quickly. As my family grew to love these precious angels, we began to come across rather large obstacles along the way not only making life harder on the girls, but on the whole family as well. Honestly, we were not prepared to deal with them.
Before the adoption of my three sisters Maggie, Malia and Makenna, my family embarked on the journey that ended with finding my little brother Kooper. A three year old, freckle faced, squished nose, orange haired, pudgy little boy who to us was rather a mystery. He lived in the same foster home ever since he was eight months old. Although his education lacked greatly and his vocabulary seemed rather small, he had been cared for in a loving home. The transition was hard but nothing we had not prepared for and soon enough I and my family were wrapped around his soft, chubby little finger. The adoption process had gone quite smoothly with Kooper and after the six months of trial foster care he was legally adopted into my family. This positive experience paved the way for future adoption experiences.
Two years later my mom came across the Wednesday's child story on three little girls. In Idaho Wednesday's child is a spotlight on children in foster care broadcasted on the news to help children become adopted. With in two weeks my family had a home study done (which typically takes 2-3 months) and our name along with three hundred other families was put into the application process to adopt the girls. After weeks the committee had narrowed the pick to 3 families, mine being one of them. After another week my family was informed we were chosen to be the girls new family, a family they had never before met. It was an exciting time as we prepared to have these three new additions to out family. However, there was nothing that could quite prepare us for what was yet to come.
We spent one day with the girls after the and after those twelve hours were expected to decide if we wanted to continue with the adoption process. Of course we agreed and the next weekend the girls were placed into our home. The complications and difficulties both emotionally and physically started as soon as the girls entered into our home. The frustrating part was that many of them could have been helped or prevented if the foster care system took the initiative and more closely evaluated the situation at hand.The Idaho State Foster system should evaluate the physical and emotional status of children prior to their adoption process. Better state involvement will not only benefit the children of the state but also adoptive families.
The first area where the foster care system needs to improve is in the medical examinations. Once parental rights have been terminated it is critical that all current and past physical problems are closely looked into. Termination of parental rights occurs by a judge typically after 18 months of children in foster care and parents have not improved their situation and their legal rights to their children are taken away (Moe). This then grants all legal custody of the child to the state health and welfare system (Dickerson). Once the state has legal power it is pertinent that all physical examinations, checkups, blood tests and DNA tests. This is so there are no more unknown cause of illness, birth defects and any other physical characteristics that seem the list bit out of the ordinary.
Many may say doing all medical tests may damage the child, but it is better for them in the long run. It is better for example to draw a small vial of blood in order to eliminate the possible risks of disease or defect than to remain ignorant of a possible condition that may end up a life threatening condition.
The next needed change to the foster system is takin action. This however does not simply mean to slap a metaphorical bandaid over the affects of the issues, but rather to try and fix the cause of the problem. Taking initiative and solving a problem may require a medical procedure, but in the long run it will be more beneficial to a child. Proper medical action not only will benefit the children's lives with a healthy start but also assist in the actual adoption of children. A prospective family will be much more willing to adopt a child with a health condition that has been addressed than a mystery. The fact of the matter is 50% of children in foster care have chronic medical issues (Adoption Statistics). Many of which can be not only helped but minimized and completely treated with proper medical action (Foster Care Facts).
My adopted siblings were a contributor to the sorrowing medical statistics. All three of my siblings had chronic medical issues when they came into our home. The youngest two had chronic sinus infections that left their noses faucets to a consistent stream of green sludge along with ear aces that left them crying almost every night. They were both on three different medications and they seemed to not be helping the situation. Once my family was allowed to make medical decisions for the girls we had tubes put in all their ears and within weeks the sinus and ear infections stopped almost completely. Along with that, the middle child Malia was born with her left eye blind and there was no known reason. We had blood and DNA tests performed to determine the problem. We soon discovered she had Peter's Anomaly which often associates with heart, lung, and other import organ abnormalities. This scary discovery was accompanied with the discovery that Makenna had Turner's syndrome -- a genetic defect on the X chromosome-- which not only can have serious other medical issues but also affects her learning ability and ADHD. With this new found knowledge, my family immediately had the girls tested. Luckily they had no life threatening conditions. We were lucky, but not all foster children are. All these medical tests my family had performed could have legally and easily been done while the children were in foster care. If their situation had been different (like many other children) the delay in medical attention could have led to life-threatening conditions.
On any given day there are 400,000 kids ranging from 0-18 in the foster care syatem (Foster Care Facts). This large number often leaves resources stretched thin. The limited resources do give an understanding to why there is such a lack of attention and detail to children in the system. According to the US foster care coalition, the Social Security Act allows for an annual 4 billion dollar budget on foster care. This accounts for approximately $10,000 for each child in the system annually. However, there are also state and grant funding that provide the system with more money. All children in foster care also are covered under medicaid (US Dept. of Health and Welfare). Although the funding for the system is rather limited, it would actually save the government money by solving children's medical issues rather than pay for the expensive medications (Adoption Statistics). It is necessary that the children of today are healthy as possible so they can lead better and more happy lives in their future.
Another flaw in the foster care system is the lack of communication between foster care providers and prospective families. According to the Foster Care Reference Center, the state (Idaho) is legally responsible to inform families of all conditions both physically and psychologically relating to the child (Foster Care Facts). However, as explained above if the full status of the child is unknown, it is rather difficult to inform a prospective parent of possible issues. If foster care providers have limited knowledge of a child's circumstances they will not be able to properly inform a parent.
Along with troubles in communication, many things told to adoptive families seem to be only part of the truth. Many of the things they do know seem rather sugar coated. The fact of the matter is 80% of children in foster care have serious psychological issues (Adoption Statistics). One of the trials in foster care that adds to these serious issues is that the average child in foster care is moved in homes several times over the average 2 year stay before adoption or reunion with biological parents (Foster Care Facts). This constant transfer of children from home to home not only has phycological repercussions but also a loss of information. As a child goes from home to home not all knowledge pertaining to the child's status is transferred with them.
My siblings (the three girls) were moved into four different foster care families during their years in care and were separated from each other for several of those times. Not only did this lead to serious detachment disorder in the children, but left them with no sense of trust and permanency. Also there seemed to be a lack of information on the previous two years of their life; leading to a larger confusion when they were placed in my families home.
Along with the lack of information provided to my family the information we did received seemed to be quite sugar coated. Before adoption we and were told the oldest child-- who had received the most abuse and neglect-- was a 'difficult child'. The only explanation for her behavior was her rather rocky past. However after many doctors visits and therapy, my family discovered she had a severe case of ADHD (partly because of the turner's syndrome) and a also delay in her learning. This newfound information helped my family better deal with the difficulties of raising Makenna and made coping with the stress much easier. If the state had done the work my family did prior to her adoption, Makenna could have had earlier educational intervention along with help pertaining to her ADHD. Also my family could have better prepared for the situation and a year of confusion and failed attempts to solve problems could have been avoided.
Similarly to the struggles of dealing with medical issues in foster care, the system is stretched rather thin in their attempt to care for all children and manage phycological problems as well. Despite this struggle the state system does put therapy and helping abuse victims (like my siblings) cope with their past high on their priority list. They do not sell children short on attaining a stable mental condition and use highly qualified therapists to do so. However, this is not enough. Talk therapy can only do so much for certain children and it is often times necessary to determine underlying causes of psychological issues rather than aiding the affects of them. If Health and Welfare spends more time and energy solving the core issues many children will better progress towards a healthy mental state. When more information is known and situations are better analyzed the adoption process will become a much smoother process for both adoptive families and children.
All in all the foster care system has rather large flaws in the way things are run, especially when it comes to foster to adoption cases. The main purpose of foster care is to the future reunion with biological families (US Dept. of Health and Welfare). Thus the foster to adopt process is not the main focus. Only 20% of foster care cases end in adoption and therefor it makes sense that it receives only a small focus (Adoption Statistics).This however needs to change. Children in the system placed for adoption often times are faced with the most terrifying past; riddled with physical abuse, neglect, sexual abuse, emotional abuse, abandonment and much more. The fact of the matter is, these children are being swept under the carpet. One reasoning for this is the ideology that some foster care providers have. Many feel because children will soon be moved onto the next stage in the process their problems will become someone else's.
Out of all foster care adoptions. 20% of fail. Along with that sobering statistic,10% of children in the system age out, thats 40,00 per year (Dickerson, Mardi). (Meaning they turn 18 with no family ties). They are then alone in the world. That is a sobering idea! If the system changes part of their focus to the children in difficult circumstances, perhaps their lives and the lives of many other families will be changed dramatically.
The entire foster care system needs an overhaul start to finish. In foster care there is a serious lack of attention to the needs of the children and families. However, many adoptions go smoothly without too much turbulence through the boat ride of adoption; like my families' adoption of Kooper. On the other hand many others have tilde-wave size obstacles. Perhaps if the system is redirected, many of these life changing disasters will be avoided. Then less children will be swept out into the unforgiving sea of the world without a strong family lifeline. In order to make this change law makers, social workers and foster families need to take action and make sure children in care are properly evaluated and taken care of. Also, families need to be properly informed and better prepared for the trials of adoption ahead. If action is not taken the foster-care system will continue to fail children. If this happens the future will be failed as well.
A Perfect Number
Six, it was the perfect number. As a kid it seemed everything important came or worked in correspondence with the number six. The mystical bubbly beverage soda (my favorite when little) came in a six-pack, there were six hot dogs in a package and twelve cookies in a dozen— because who eats just one? Not only that, but six makes three groups of two, which is perfect so everyone has a partner for Disney Land rides and no one rides alone. Also, six makes seating in a suburban perfect. There are 3 rows of seats leaving plenty of room for two individuals on a bench with plenty of room to spread out, stretch, and store rations for long car trips. Finally, six wooden chairs placed around an old oak table giving each member of my family their own place to enjoy meals filled with laughter and joy together.
Life seemed perfect. I loved growing up with a family of six, it seemed it was the perfect number and I cherished every day I spent together with them. My family consisted of my two parents, two older brothers, and then my younger brother and I. Now don’t get me wrong, my family sure disagreed on many things and rarely shared opinions on certain matters, however everything always worked out. One of the best things was the family pairing. My parents naturally went together being married, and my two older brothers combined forces out of similar interest— to torment my younger brother and I. Which left us to unite in the defense of one another. That bond not only saved us from potential torment, but it formed a friendship that will last a lifetime.
The close-knit friendship between my brothers and I rarely skipped a beat. It didn’t matter if we fought one minute because the next we would go on marvelous adventures and the contention slipped from our minds. We constructed forts from sheets transforming our bedroom into a vibrant Indian tapestry market with only one secret entrance. Together we trekked the frozen tundra of the mysterious new world of the backyard. And in summer we ate otter pops until our mouths no longer resembled a color recognizable to the human eye and our taste buds blasted into shock from the excessive amounts of sugar ingested. Even as time went on and we grew, nothing could stand in our way. We, the youngest in the family prided ourselves on being just that. Those were the days.
The thing about younger years is their predictableness. I loved predictable. I delighted in the idea that when I finally arrived home after school I found snacks on the table and my mom at home. Every weekday and weekend was the same. Monday through Friday delivered hours of school and play. And Saturdays were my favorite. My parents hated the repetitiveness, but I on the other hand loved waking up early Saturday morning to go watch my brother’s baseball games in the spring, football in the fall, and swimming in the summer. I also enjoyed certain structured activities; the structure created a secure environment for me. Who knew everything would change so quickly. At age fourteen I never expected my life to flip so suddenly. My Mom talked about wanting to adopt a baby for awhile, but yet nothing really happened. That’s why it came as such a shock when my parents sat all my siblings and I down in the living room to discuss the potential of adding another child to the mix. After a conversation we came to the general consensus adoption would add to the general happiness of the family.After a while we had no luck adopting an infant . The talk of adopting slightly older children through the state gradually came to the forefront of conversation. This made me nervous and scared. Like staying up all night, can’t- stop- thinking- about- horrible- things- that- could- possibly- go- wrong kind of fears and nightmares. The fear probably came from selfish thoughts but I, for one, didn’t like the idea of change; especially change that I didn’t have control over.
However, one little picture took that fear and erased it from my mind. A photograph of a fair skinned, chubby cheeked little three year old boy. His blue eyes resembled the fresh sky after a rain storm and his vibrant orange hair created an aura of jubilance around him . The first time I saw the picture, my heart started beating as if sounding for battle. Starting out slow and strong and continually increasing in temp. After a minute the perpetual beating left me tired, exhausted and wheezing as if I had just ended a marathon. Something about his smiling face melted my heart like ice cream in the summer sun. I had no idea what, but something about this boy struck my heart, leaving me with a strong yearning to fill it.
Little did I know within a month the void in my heart would be spewing over. After several weeks of finishing up paperwork, home studies and requests for adoption, a red line appeared around a Saturday on the calendar hanging in the kitchen. Before I knew it the day arrived. The night before I wrestled for hours with my sheets and I believe they ended the night victorious leaving me exhausted and feeling sick. The car ride to meet this mystery cherub seemed to drag on as if a four hour long chemistry lecture. The built up anxiety and excitement left my nerves running rampant throughout my body, searching for a way out.
Finally. We had arrived. Excitement, anxiety, curiosity, fear and insecurity all fought within my head and left me in an emotional stupor. As the car filled with my family came to a hault in the parking lot of the Glenns Ferry Park, my eyes scanned back and forth searching for the little boy who for the past month ran around my head leaving little muddy footprints in my dreams. One more glance to the right. Stop. Was that him? Was that the boy who changed my life forever?
The car stopped. I sat there frozen. Frozen like a cold Logan Winter morning. Within an instant my family stepped out of the car and somehow my chilled body followed them. Each step loosened my joints and soon my stride increased in speed. As we walked over to the foster parents I couldn’t keep my eyes from drifting towards the red-headed angel throwing baseballs and tumbling towards them. My parents began talking, however their words slowly muffled into silence and my body drifted towards the tiny angel. His un-proportionate chubby body forced my heart to grin and heart to pulse rapidly. His jean shorts, too long for his body, almost reached his ankles and the bright red shirt brought out his sun kissed cheeks. As he smiled his cheeks pushed up on his face closing his eyes into a tiny squint. Every laugh and every smile stole another piece of my heart. I looked down. A small baseball stitched with red rolled into my foot. Looking up I saw a chunky little hand point at the ball and the beholder grinning. No introductions needed. Soon the mini world series broke out and the cherub ended the game stealing my heart.
My family and I all loaded back into the car and drove away. I knew from that day on my life would never be the same. I couldn’t wait for the day when the little angel came home. To my home. And let me say life never remained the same. Who said there was a perfect number for anything? Truly was there such a vast difference between six and seven? Thinking about it we just needed to buy two packs of soda or hot dogs. And really, who doesn't enjoy leftovers? But why stop at seven? Within the next two years three more children came into the life of my family, bringing the Monks family to the perfect number ten.
Our family pictures now have three adorable blue eyed, blond, smiling faces. Overnight my family gained three adorable little sisters at the ages of 4,5 and 7. Similarly as before, as soon as I met this trio of angels my heart was stolen once again. However with them no anxiety was involved. Sure excitement and nerves filled me waiting for the day they came home, but no fears muddled my thoughts. I have come to love all four of my adopted siblings as if they were my own flesh and blood. I can't imagine my life without them in it? The family additions have only added to the perfection. Just think! Now basketball games consist of five on five. Each person brings their own challenges and strengths to the family; and together we fit perfectly. Sure, car trips feel more tightly packed and a new table sits in the dining area, but that just makes dinner more entertaining. Now there is never a dull moment in the Monks’ household. Who says there is a perfect number? Maybe there is, but maybe, just maybe the perfect number is one that brings the most joy and happiness into a life. And for me, that number is ever expanding and eternal.
Six, it was the perfect number. As a kid it seemed everything important came or worked in correspondence with the number six. The mystical bubbly beverage soda (my favorite when little) came in a six-pack, there were six hot dogs in a package and twelve cookies in a dozen— because who eats just one? Not only that, but six makes three groups of two, which is perfect so everyone has a partner for Disney Land rides and no one rides alone. Also, six makes seating in a suburban perfect. There are 3 rows of seats leaving plenty of room for two individuals on a bench with plenty of room to spread out, stretch, and store rations for long car trips. Finally, six wooden chairs placed around an old oak table giving each member of my family their own place to enjoy meals filled with laughter and joy together.
Life seemed perfect. I loved growing up with a family of six, it seemed it was the perfect number and I cherished every day I spent together with them. My family consisted of my two parents, two older brothers, and then my younger brother and I. Now don’t get me wrong, my family sure disagreed on many things and rarely shared opinions on certain matters, however everything always worked out. One of the best things was the family pairing. My parents naturally went together being married, and my two older brothers combined forces out of similar interest— to torment my younger brother and I. Which left us to unite in the defense of one another. That bond not only saved us from potential torment, but it formed a friendship that will last a lifetime.
The close-knit friendship between my brothers and I rarely skipped a beat. It didn’t matter if we fought one minute because the next we would go on marvelous adventures and the contention slipped from our minds. We constructed forts from sheets transforming our bedroom into a vibrant Indian tapestry market with only one secret entrance. Together we trekked the frozen tundra of the mysterious new world of the backyard. And in summer we ate otter pops until our mouths no longer resembled a color recognizable to the human eye and our taste buds blasted into shock from the excessive amounts of sugar ingested. Even as time went on and we grew, nothing could stand in our way. We, the youngest in the family prided ourselves on being just that. Those were the days.
The thing about younger years is their predictableness. I loved predictable. I delighted in the idea that when I finally arrived home after school I found snacks on the table and my mom at home. Every weekday and weekend was the same. Monday through Friday delivered hours of school and play. And Saturdays were my favorite. My parents hated the repetitiveness, but I on the other hand loved waking up early Saturday morning to go watch my brother’s baseball games in the spring, football in the fall, and swimming in the summer. I also enjoyed certain structured activities; the structure created a secure environment for me. Who knew everything would change so quickly. At age fourteen I never expected my life to flip so suddenly. My Mom talked about wanting to adopt a baby for awhile, but yet nothing really happened. That’s why it came as such a shock when my parents sat all my siblings and I down in the living room to discuss the potential of adding another child to the mix. After a conversation we came to the general consensus adoption would add to the general happiness of the family.After a while we had no luck adopting an infant . The talk of adopting slightly older children through the state gradually came to the forefront of conversation. This made me nervous and scared. Like staying up all night, can’t- stop- thinking- about- horrible- things- that- could- possibly- go- wrong kind of fears and nightmares. The fear probably came from selfish thoughts but I, for one, didn’t like the idea of change; especially change that I didn’t have control over.
However, one little picture took that fear and erased it from my mind. A photograph of a fair skinned, chubby cheeked little three year old boy. His blue eyes resembled the fresh sky after a rain storm and his vibrant orange hair created an aura of jubilance around him . The first time I saw the picture, my heart started beating as if sounding for battle. Starting out slow and strong and continually increasing in temp. After a minute the perpetual beating left me tired, exhausted and wheezing as if I had just ended a marathon. Something about his smiling face melted my heart like ice cream in the summer sun. I had no idea what, but something about this boy struck my heart, leaving me with a strong yearning to fill it.
Little did I know within a month the void in my heart would be spewing over. After several weeks of finishing up paperwork, home studies and requests for adoption, a red line appeared around a Saturday on the calendar hanging in the kitchen. Before I knew it the day arrived. The night before I wrestled for hours with my sheets and I believe they ended the night victorious leaving me exhausted and feeling sick. The car ride to meet this mystery cherub seemed to drag on as if a four hour long chemistry lecture. The built up anxiety and excitement left my nerves running rampant throughout my body, searching for a way out.
Finally. We had arrived. Excitement, anxiety, curiosity, fear and insecurity all fought within my head and left me in an emotional stupor. As the car filled with my family came to a hault in the parking lot of the Glenns Ferry Park, my eyes scanned back and forth searching for the little boy who for the past month ran around my head leaving little muddy footprints in my dreams. One more glance to the right. Stop. Was that him? Was that the boy who changed my life forever?
The car stopped. I sat there frozen. Frozen like a cold Logan Winter morning. Within an instant my family stepped out of the car and somehow my chilled body followed them. Each step loosened my joints and soon my stride increased in speed. As we walked over to the foster parents I couldn’t keep my eyes from drifting towards the red-headed angel throwing baseballs and tumbling towards them. My parents began talking, however their words slowly muffled into silence and my body drifted towards the tiny angel. His un-proportionate chubby body forced my heart to grin and heart to pulse rapidly. His jean shorts, too long for his body, almost reached his ankles and the bright red shirt brought out his sun kissed cheeks. As he smiled his cheeks pushed up on his face closing his eyes into a tiny squint. Every laugh and every smile stole another piece of my heart. I looked down. A small baseball stitched with red rolled into my foot. Looking up I saw a chunky little hand point at the ball and the beholder grinning. No introductions needed. Soon the mini world series broke out and the cherub ended the game stealing my heart.
My family and I all loaded back into the car and drove away. I knew from that day on my life would never be the same. I couldn’t wait for the day when the little angel came home. To my home. And let me say life never remained the same. Who said there was a perfect number for anything? Truly was there such a vast difference between six and seven? Thinking about it we just needed to buy two packs of soda or hot dogs. And really, who doesn't enjoy leftovers? But why stop at seven? Within the next two years three more children came into the life of my family, bringing the Monks family to the perfect number ten.
Our family pictures now have three adorable blue eyed, blond, smiling faces. Overnight my family gained three adorable little sisters at the ages of 4,5 and 7. Similarly as before, as soon as I met this trio of angels my heart was stolen once again. However with them no anxiety was involved. Sure excitement and nerves filled me waiting for the day they came home, but no fears muddled my thoughts. I have come to love all four of my adopted siblings as if they were my own flesh and blood. I can't imagine my life without them in it? The family additions have only added to the perfection. Just think! Now basketball games consist of five on five. Each person brings their own challenges and strengths to the family; and together we fit perfectly. Sure, car trips feel more tightly packed and a new table sits in the dining area, but that just makes dinner more entertaining. Now there is never a dull moment in the Monks’ household. Who says there is a perfect number? Maybe there is, but maybe, just maybe the perfect number is one that brings the most joy and happiness into a life. And for me, that number is ever expanding and eternal.
Reading to Children at Home ( Group Portfolio)
Audience Analysis
Intro:
For our group project, we propose that parents read to their children on a day to day basis. This will help them improve their academic skills, reading comprehension, and social interaction. In this paper we want to address parents or guardians of children and students. We are concerned that in the modern world we face today that most kids are not being read to as often as they need to. We are looking to propose a plan to help encourage parents to read to their children on a more consistent basis.
Key Characteristics:
We want to focus on middle class families with children from infancy to adolescence. It is not only important for the adults to understand our purpose, but also for people of younger ages to understand the benefits of reading to encourage their reading habits. Many families have very busy schedules and may not have sufficient time to spend reading to their children.
Another thing that will affect the way we address our audience is taking into account the different cultures and backgrounds that families come from. We realize that not every family speaks English because of their cultural backgrounds and circumstances. Regardless of the language they speak and cultural background we still want to encourage them to apply these same concepts.
Attitude of Audience:
In general, our audience will agree that reading to children from an early age is beneficial for both their social skills and learning development. We are not concerned about convincingparents that reading is important, but rather our issue is convincing parents they need to implement consistent reading into their child's lives. We also will be trying to convince parents and guardians to continue reading to their children even when they can read on their own. We also want parents to encourage their children to read non academically. Some parents may feel that the only reading their children need is from their classes at school.
Executive Summary
Reading: should parents read to kids? Insist on kids reading to themselves at home? How much?
What is the Problem:
Older kids these days are not always at the reading level they need to be at to succeed in school. Not only does this affect them academically but it will also affect them in real life .Especially after high school graduation. Parents need to approach this problem now, while their kids are still young, rather than later.
Where is the problem:
Although this problem exists in many places around the world, for the purposes of this argument and to narrow the topic, the focus will be on the United States population and how reading to children affects Americans later in life.
When did it become a problem:
We generally do not think about how the amount of reading we do with our kids affects them. Over the years we have begun to realize the correlation between reading to kids when they are younger and the affects it has on their academic success when they are older. Its hard to say when this really became a problem because it has slowly progressed over time.
Who does it impact:
This impacts the kids themselves. To help them be more successful in life they need to start reading young. This will help them develop skills that will make them more successful academically. Not only will it benefit them now, but also later in life.
How did it become a problem:
This became a problem by parents passing on the responsibility of reading with their kids to their children’s teachers at school. The reason this is a problem is because teachers do not have the adequate amount of time; they have too many other subjects they need to cover in one day. This means the amount of reading time a child gets at school is simply not enough. This is where parents come in. Parents need to spend time reading to their kids to help them get the one-on-one reading time they need.
Why should the audience care:
Reading to children when they are younger affects them in many different areas in life; both developmentally and intellectually. Not only will it improve their literacy, but it will also assist in the development of their language and communication skills later in life. If parents want their children to reach their potential in literacy and want them to be more successful inschooling, it is in their best interest to understand the benefits of reading to their children at a young age.
Proposal
Parents typically will agree that reading to young children will benefit them. Although they may agree, it doesn't mean that they will incorporate the concept into their lives. Along with this general understanding, there are many studies conducted in the United States that show the positive benefits of reading aloud to children consistently at a young age. These studies evaluate not only language cognition but also reading levels, social interaction, and other important life skills.
There are many different intellectual advantages that result from reading aloud to children, the most obvious being an increase in the child's reading level and ability. Along with a higher reading ability, students who are read to at home also have a higher level of writing.(Spellings). This tie between reading and writing helps students not only in their literacy skills but also in many other subjects (10 reasons).If children become comfortable with reading at a young age, they tend to be able to pick out concepts more easily in other areas of school.
Along with educational and intellectual benefits, reading aloud to children also increases their language skills and social interaction. (10 Reasons). It has been shown through several studies and research in elementary level students, that children with a larger vocabulary tend to do better in formal education settings (Mathieson). Children who have an overall larger vocabulary not only have a better ability to communicate with their peers and superiors but also are more competent in expressing their feelings and inner thoughts. This ability can result inhigher self esteem and self worth which is extremely important in children during the developmental years (Santrock).
Another one of the many benefits of reading aloud to children is the influence it has onseveral life skills. It has been shown that when parents read to their children it helps them develop their cognitive thinking skills as well as the ability to grasp abstract concepts. Reading to children and having them practice reading helps them develop concentration skills (10 Reasons). Developing a child's critical thinking skills will help them in their academics as well as in real life situations.
The importance of reading to children is readily apparent and most would not argue the benefits of reading together. In fact parents can see results through short, consistent reading sessions. It is our goal that parents take the initiative and encourage their children to develop and increase their skills by taking just ten minutes a day to read to their children. Many parents may say they are too busy to take time to read to their children but encourage their kids to read alone. Although a child’s personal reading is important, it is simply not enough. The average American spends two hours on social media and two and a half hours watching television daily. It seems as if there are ten minutes in a day that can be spared to increase their child's educational development (Hinckley). Ten minutes, thats all it takes. However as parents and children adjust to reading together it is encouraged to adjust the time to longer periods to greater influence the benefits of reading.
Although reading to children and independent reading is important, it is also necessary to not allow it to get out of hand. Reading needs to be encouraged not only academically but also for fun. The ability to get lost in a book and explore with imagination is incredible, however there needs to be balance. Parents shouldn’t force children to sit and read for long periods oftime, this could take all the fun out of it. Short amounts here and there with time for discussion and questions however can be very beneficial. Not only for the child to grow intellectually but for bonding time between parent and child.
Dr. Gary Reglin and Dr. Horace Cameron of Nova Southeastern University, and Dr.Nonofo Losike-Sedimo of University of Botswana, conducted a study that determined the effectiveness of parental involvement in students reading scores. They selected 30 students randomly from seventh grade who failed the EOG reading test in the 2009-2010 school years. Results showed that when the parents intervened the experimental groups reading comprehension scores increased. (cite) It is statistically proven that a parents involvement increases their child’s academic skills. As discussed previously, reading helps develop a child’s critical thinking, ability to grasp abstract concepts, and broadening their vocabulary. Reading also helps develop imagination, social interactions, and problem solving. All of these skills not only help children through their academic careers, but they last with them throughout their lives. These skills will help them far beyond their schooling years.
Works Cited
"10 Reasons Why should Read to your Children ." Early Moments- Sharing the Gift of Reading .N.p., n.d. Web. 10 Feb 2014.
Burns, Judith. "Keep Reading with your Children." BBC News- Education and Family . BBC, 16 Sept 2013. Web. 10 Feb 2014
Cervone, B. Cushmanp, K. Whatkidscando. “Advice for Parents: Helping Your Child Succeed in School-and Life.” 24, Ap. 2013. Web. 10 Feb. 2014.
Cullinan, Bernice, and Brod Bagert. "Reading With Your Child." Reading With Your Child. U.S. Department of Education, n.d. Web. 03 Feb. 2014.
Larsen, Douglas P1, Andrew C2 Butler, and Henry L3 Roediger Iii. "Comparative Effects OfTest-Enhanced Learning And Self-Explanation On Long-Term Retention." Medical Education 47.7 (2013): 674-682. Education Source. Web. 27 Feb. 2014.
Moats, Dr. "When Older Students Can't Read." LD OnLine: The World's Leading Website on Learning Disabilities and ADHD. N.p., 2010. Web. 04 Feb. 2014.
Mathiesson, Connie. "The hidden benefits of reading aloud - even for older kids." Great Schools.Great Schools Inc., n.d. Web. 10 Feb 2014.
Pérez-López, David1, and Manuel1, mcontero@i3bh.es Contero. "Delivering Educational Multimedia Contents Through An Augmented Reality Application: A Case Study On Its Impact On Knowledge Acquisition And Retention." Turkish Online Journal OfEducational Technology 12.4 (2013): 19-28. Education Source. Web. 27 Feb. 2014.
REGLIN, GARY, HORACE CAMERON, and NONOFO LOSIKE-SEDIMO. "Effects Of A Parent Support Reading Intervention On Seventh-Grade At-Risk Students' Reading Comprehension Scores." Reading Improvement 49.1 (2012): 17-27. Academic Search Premier. Web. 25 Feb. 2014.
Spellings , Margaret. US Department of Educatiom . Office of Communication and Outreach .Helping Your Child become a Reader. Washington DC: , 2005. Web.
Sukhram, Diana Patricia, and Amy Hsu. "Developing Reading Partnerships Between Parents And Children: A Reflection On The Reading Together Program." Early Childhood Education Journal 40.2 (2012): 115-121. ERIC. Web. 25 Feb. 2014.
Whitebread, David, and Sue Bingham. "Too Much, Too Young: Should Schooling Start at Age 7?" - Opinion. N.p., 18 Nov. 2013. Web. 10 Feb. 2014.
Saturday, April 12, 2014
Morgan Monks
Informant: Jerry Morgan
Place Collected: Grandfather's home
Title: An Aging Text
Genre: Artifact
Informant:
The person whom I found my artifact from was my Grandfather on my mother's side. He had been given the family bible form his family and had been keeping it in storage.
Context:
In order to collect this Bible I asked my mother where the Bible was because I had seen it when I was younger but it had been a long time since I had last seen it. I then asked my mom to locate it and it happened to be at my Grandfather's house. He brought it over to my mom and she took some pictures and sent them to me. She also gave me a little backstory of the family bible (mostly which my grandfather had told her)
Text:
The item is an old family bible from the early 1800's with a family history in the front pages. It is a rather average bible from that time period with no special decoration considering my ancestors purchased the book either right before or soon after their voyage to the America's. It also has inserts of birth, death, and marriage dates.
Texture:
I feel like the age of this book really gives it a lot of texture. When you flip the pages the old material and the age on the spine really lends to a sense of awe and curiosity when it comes to antiques. It is crazy to think that this book has lived over wars and famine and plague when the owner's may have not.
Meaning:
This family bible really means a lot to me not because of the bible, but because of the records inside of it. As much as I love looking at things of the past-- because I love to look at them and just wonder about the stories it could hold-- It really meant a lot to be able to look at the names of my ancestors written with a quill and ink. It made me really appreciative of their pilgrimage and the opportunities that their struggles and trials have given to me. I now want to study more about these ancestors and find more about my history and past.
Informant: Jerry Morgan
Place Collected: Grandfather's home
Title: An Aging Text
Genre: Artifact
Informant:
The person whom I found my artifact from was my Grandfather on my mother's side. He had been given the family bible form his family and had been keeping it in storage.
Context:
In order to collect this Bible I asked my mother where the Bible was because I had seen it when I was younger but it had been a long time since I had last seen it. I then asked my mom to locate it and it happened to be at my Grandfather's house. He brought it over to my mom and she took some pictures and sent them to me. She also gave me a little backstory of the family bible (mostly which my grandfather had told her)
Text:
The item is an old family bible from the early 1800's with a family history in the front pages. It is a rather average bible from that time period with no special decoration considering my ancestors purchased the book either right before or soon after their voyage to the America's. It also has inserts of birth, death, and marriage dates.
Texture:
I feel like the age of this book really gives it a lot of texture. When you flip the pages the old material and the age on the spine really lends to a sense of awe and curiosity when it comes to antiques. It is crazy to think that this book has lived over wars and famine and plague when the owner's may have not.
Meaning:
This family bible really means a lot to me not because of the bible, but because of the records inside of it. As much as I love looking at things of the past-- because I love to look at them and just wonder about the stories it could hold-- It really meant a lot to be able to look at the names of my ancestors written with a quill and ink. It made me really appreciative of their pilgrimage and the opportunities that their struggles and trials have given to me. I now want to study more about these ancestors and find more about my history and past.
Tuesday, March 25, 2014
Morgan Monks
Informant: Myself/ Mom
Place Item Collected: My memory
Title: A Lullaby
of Love
Genre: Family
Song
Informant: My
mother is the person who would always sing this song to me and my younger
brother. She has been eternally 39 for 4 years now and was born in Las Vegas.
My mother grew up in a home where her parents weren’t very involved and I think
that situation has made her become quite opposite to that. My mom has always
tried to be very involved and supportive in my life but not overbearing.
Context: My
mom used to sing me a song every night, even when I was older. I honestly don’t
know when I stopped asking her to but I remember thinking to myself I was
probably too old to have a lullaby every night but I didn’t really care. I also
used to think that my mom had a wonderful voice and even told her she should go
on American Idol. She laughed at me and
I never understood until later and I now recognize why she thought my idea was
so comical. I never knew this until I was older but my mom would also sing that
same song to my younger brother Kaden. I don’t know if the song had as much as
a profound effect on him but I can only assume it was similar considering he
told me that song was also his favorite and he asked for it often.
Text: The words
to the song ‘You are my Sunshine’ that my mom would sing to me every night are
as follows:
You are my sunshine,
My only sunshine.
You make me happy
When skies are grey.
You’ll never know dear,
How much I love you.
Please don’t take my sunshine away
Texture:
My mom used to
sing this song to me almost every night, when I was scared, and when I was sad.
As expected as I grew older the songs came less and less frequent. However when
I was older (as I said probably too old to be getting them) I remember some
nights I would ask my mom to come into my room and sing the song to me. When
she would sing the song she would sit on my bed, and push the hair away from my
face as she sang to me. After she was done she would leave my room, and start
to close the door just before I would stop her to leave it partly opened. (I
always loved falling asleep to the noise of my parents up and talking or
watching television).
Meaning:
I never really
thought about the importance of this song to me until recently. I mean I always
loved the song. To be honest when I was younger I thought my mom had made it up
and I was the only one she sang it to because I was her only sunshine. Except
when I figured it out that she in fact did not right the song nor was I the
only one she sang it to, there was no difference in the meaning of it to me. I
felt like she meant that song every time she sung it to me. Even when I was
older to me that song meant I love you and I will always love you. I feel like
my mom’s skies will be grey if I am gone for forever. I have gotten just a
little glimpse of what it feels like to be away from her by being at college.
Just being able to give her a hug or talk to her whenever we are in the same
room means a lot and I really took that for granted when I was home. To me this
song is so much more than just a lullaby; it is the characterization of my
mother’s and my relationship. She is my best friend and right now she is my
sunshine. I don’t know what I would do without her. She is always the one I can
go and talk to about anything and we never stay mad at each other for more than
a little bit. I plan to serve an LDS mission and I think that this song is one
of those things I will be able to keep in my heart and be close to her.
Bonnie Moore
English 2010-027 @10:30
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